38 Weeks

"I don't divide my love between all my children - I multiply it."

NST today. Went very well.

Usually baby's heart rate is in the 120's and gets up to the 150's when baby moves. Today the heart rate was in the 140's and went as high as the 170's. Very active little one. Guess the candy bar 1 hour before was a good idea.

Doctor says I am now 75% effaced and 1 cm dialated.

I am both nervous and excited.

Last night it started to hit me - can I really do this?

I have 7 children who I love and adore.

My hormones like to put doubt in my head, but my heart knows better.

There was a time I wondered about caring for a 7th child. And now, I can't imagine my life not being blessed with Jacob.

Jacob is the sweetest 1 year old I know.

He cuddles with me, gives hugs to everyone, and kisses with such love.

Right now he is sleeping next to me.

Once in awhile he wakes up in his crib and cries or starts saying "Momma."

I get up and bring him into bed with me. He just cuddles up and falls back to sleep.

I'm not big on letting our children cry themselves to sleep.

To this day I can remember Rachel being in her crib and I came home kind of late from the grocery store. I tried to sneak upstairs to bed, but she heard the squeaky step. Her crying stopped for a moment and then I heard a very clear and very sad and hopeful "Momma?"

I went right in and got her.

I think that helps children to feel safe and secure.

I just hope that Jakey doesn't mind sharing momma. And I hope he will sleep through a newborn's crying.

At least school will be done for the year and no one will have to get up early or stay up late doing homework.

Me...Momma of 8.

Amazing.